Wednesday, September 20, 2006


Halloween Blows!!

I can't stand Halloween. I don't like the holiday at all because:
  • I don't like to purchase a costume for kids that they will only wear once and not remember three weeks later
  • I don't like the idea of begging for candy
  • Why not beg for candy all year long instead of October

I want to create a holiday where we can beg for meat. You go to someones door and you say "Trick or Meat" and you get a hamburger or a piece of steak or something. I realize this is frought with perversion at the chance of seeing someones actual "meat"(euphemism for penis). But you must take the good with the bad. You will get a lot of meat and look at very few penises and you won't remember either three weeks later.

If you insist on going trick or treating, dress as this guy:

1 comment:

Scott Sabol said...

If I see any penises trick or treating with my son flapping around, you damn well better believe I won't forget it. I might need counseling to wipe this image out of my psychy. Please, no more euphemisms for male genetalia.